A Woman Is No Man – Etaf Rum

A Woman Is No Man – Etaf Rum

About The Book

A brilliant, powerful book detailing the complexity of a dual identity (in this case, Palestinian-American) across 3 generations of Muslim women.

In her debut novel Etaf Rum tells the story of three generations of Palestinian-American women struggling to express their individual desires within the confines of their Arab culture in the wake of shocking intimate violence in their community—a story of culture and honor, secrets and betrayals, love and violence. Set in an America at once foreign to many and staggeringly close at hand, A Woman Is No Man is an intimate glimpse into a controlling and closed cultural world, and a universal tale about family and the ways silence and shame can destroy those we have sworn to protect.

My Review: YUS GURL GET IT

Writing this a female, Malay-muslim Singaporean, there were parts of this book that resonated so completely with me. It was fascinating to see how religion can influence so many similar cultural patterns despite geography. Sometimes I felt all three women were voicing the thoughts I’ve had my whole life.

“You know,” Fareeda said after a moment, “Arabs use the term majnoon to mean madness, but if you break the word apart, what do you see?” Deya only looked at her. “The word jinn,” Fareeda said, settling back in her seat. “Madness is derived from the jinn, an evil spirit inside you. Therapy and medicine can’t fix that.”

“Are you serious? That’s your explanation for everything? You think you can just blame this on the jinn? That’s not good enough. This isn’t some story, where you can tie up everything as you please at the end. This isn’t make-believe.”

Etaf Rum

I have to admit, I LOL-ed at the above paragraph. Why? Because it’s something I’ve heard countless of times from extended family members, in Malay dramas shown on television, through my social worker friends working closely with Malay communities. Depression? Schizophrenia? Any sort of mental health issues?

You see? You don’t pray enough, and now the jinn has taken over you.

Why You Should Read It

If you’re a Muslim woman, I think you’d enjoy it. Read it to feel less alone. Read it to stay hopeful of a future where we teach our daughters that their husbands should always treat them as equal, that their needs cannot and should not be diminished, that they are more than the babies they can carry and hands that cook and clean.